Kids’ Party Invitations: The Dilemma of Who and How to Invite

As adults, we often want to forget that day each year when our birthday rolls around. But as kids, there’s no more important day. 

And when it comes to celebrating, kids want to be surrounded by everyone they know! As fun as this sounds, it’s often not practical. Depending on the nature of the party, the location, and (most importantly) your budget, kids are usually forced to limit the number of friends they can invite to their birthday celebration.

How then do you navigate the difficult decisions such as who to invite, how to deliver the invitations, the pre-party buzz, and the kids who are left out? Even worse, what if yours is one of the left out kids?

There’s no easy way to spare a sensitive child’s feelings in these situations, and part of it is a lesson in character building for the future. But, being intentional in the way you handle all aspects of the party can avoid a mountain of problems from arising. 

Here are some best practices to smooth the way for a good all-around party experience for your child and his or her friends.

First, The Initial Party Plan

When first planning your party, talk with your child about the fact that different options may mean she can invite a different number of friends. A character-themed party at your house may allow for 20 kids, while a more structured party out may limit the number of friends due to cost and/or space considerations.

Ask your child to make an invite list before finalizing the party details, rather than trying to adjust the number of invites after she’s settled on the party type.

Second, Delivering the Invitations

Paper invitations used to be the only option, although it seems that most people have gone to some form of evites for ease these days. Whatever you do, don’t send the invitations to school with the child unless you’re inviting the whole class.

Mailing the invitations and collecting RSVPs by phone or email may be the most discreet way of doing things, although it is the most time consuming.

If you do decide on the convenience of electronic invites, you may want to keep the guest list anonymous depending on the age of your child. This will avoid gossip around who’s invited and who’s not. 

Most importantly, as you’re preparing invitations in whatever form, just ask yourself whether you’re protecting against any awkward situations or hurt feelings as best you can.

Third, the Pre and Post-Party Buzz

Your child will be excited, and will undoubtedly want to talk about his party before and after it happens. Talk to your child about being aware of other kids’ feelings when doing this.

You certainly don’t want to squelch any of their birthday excitement, but you also want to raise kind and sensitive children.  

This conversation will depend on your child’s age, but simply sitting down and talking about being in situations where non-included children are present, and how to deal with any issues those children might raise, will go a long way towards ensuring more pleasant outcomes here.

You may want to help your child come up with a response he feels good about as to why all of his friends or classmates couldn’t be included in the celebration.

Finally, What if Your Child is the Excluded One?

This can be one of the hardest early parenting experiences with your kids. Not everyone is going to like you, and you aren’t always going to be invited to everything.

The best thing you can do for your child here is to listen. Acknowledge her feelings, give her examples of situations where she’s obviously been loved and included, and remind her that she excludes friends from activities at times too, which doesn’t mean she dislikes those friends.

Exclusion is something that happens at times in everyone’s lives, from childhood through adulthood. Use these moments to build your child’s self-esteem so she will be prepared to effectively navigate the issue for a lifetime.

As the party planner, think about how your child feels when excluded, and work to minimize any hurt feelings in every step you take. If you’ll do this, your party is bound to be one that is remembered happily by your child and her friends for a lifetime.

At kidspartycharacters.com, we have several packages to accommodate most any size party you desire, along with over 200 characters to choose from, face painting, balloon artists, and more. Visit our website to start planning your next party today.

Find party pics, videos, and testimonials on our Facebook page: Facebook.com/kidspartycharactersny

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